| Everyone feels lonely at one time or another. And | | | | home, where you can always be a part of a good |
| it can be hard to make new friends in today's | | | | social setting. Be gregarious, even if you are shy. |
| troubled and unpredictable world. The friends and | | | | All you have to do is ask someone what kind of |
| acquaintances we have may be so busy and | | | | interesting drink they have, or talk about the |
| preoccupied they don't even notice how lonely we | | | | news or weather. Engage in conversations -- they |
| are. We may not tell them how we feel because | | | | are loneliness busters! |
| we don't want to bother anyone. So . . . we | | | | 9. Read the local newspaper. |
| suffer in silence. | | | | You'll feel more a part of the world by keeping up |
| What's a person to do? | | | | with current events. And there are always stories |
| Well, if you find yourself sitting at home - alone - | | | | about local groups and organizations which may be |
| and feeling sorry for yourself, simply try a few of | | | | of interest to you, and offer you an opportunity |
| these 15 tricks to decrease loneliness and make | | | | to meet people. |
| new friends. They have worked for many of my | | | | 10. Offer to teach a class or workshop at the |
| clients, and they will work for you. | | | | local YMCA or community education center. |
| 15 Sure-Fire Techniques | | | | Chances are, you have a skill or area of expertise |
| 1. Look through your address book or think of old | | | | that others are interested in learning. You'll enjoy |
| relationships which you might revive. Even if | | | | the social contact you'll experience. Share your |
| you've lost your job, you can contact a few of | | | | knowledge and skill with others. How good you'll |
| your previous co-workers and arrange to meet | | | | feel! |
| them for lunch or a social outing. Stay in touch | | | | 11. Inquire about membership in a civic |
| and keep those relationships going. | | | | organization. |
| 2. Keep up any current relationships, as well . . . | | | | There are many worthwhile organizations that |
| stay in touch with your friends and associates. | | | | may be of interest to you. Ask if you can sit in |
| Offer to meet them for coffee or tea. | | | | on a meeting to decide if you'd like to join. A |
| 3. Use your hobbies and interests as a springboard | | | | friend of mine dealt with the loss of her husband, |
| for meeting new people. Join a book reading | | | | due to cancer, by joining Habit For Humanity. |
| group, gardening club or sign up for an exercise | | | | Every time she helped build a house she had a |
| class. | | | | great time and felt connected to others in a |
| Let's say you keep tropical fish. You can join the | | | | meaningful way. |
| local aquarium club and faithfully attend their | | | | 12. Participate in chat rooms and blogs on subjects |
| meetings. Join the chess club or a writer's group. | | | | of your interest, and keep up with others on the |
| When you are at a meeting, go out of your way | | | | Internet. But beware not to overdo it. Nothing |
| to initiate conversations. In time, relationships will | | | | replaces real live friends with whom you can |
| follow. And you won't feel so lonely! | | | | interact in person! |
| In the small town where I live there is a drawing | | | | 13. Take a part-time job in a restaurant or other |
| club, and people who enjoy sketching and drawing | | | | business where you can meet and serve people |
| get together once or twice a month to do what | | | | and take an interest in other employees. |
| they love. And there is an art guild, consisting of | | | | 14. Avoid being a stranger. There are people out |
| local artists who give one another support and | | | | there who want and need to know you, but you |
| encouragement. | | | | have to look for them! Let's say you go ot the |
| Whatever you like to do, you can find a club or | | | | bookstore and you open the door for others. You |
| organization which can be of help to you in | | | | are taking a small but important step toward |
| meeting new friends. | | | | feeling more connected to others and being in a |
| 4. Volunteer your time. | | | | positive social setting. |
| No matter where you may live, there is probably | | | | Go out of your way to introduce yourself to |
| an animal shelter that needs volunteers to help | | | | others and show an interest in them. Wherever |
| care for the homeless pets. | | | | you go, take your best (and most outgoing) |
| Our local newspaper ran a story last week about | | | | personality along with you . . . and use it to |
| a man who lost his job, so he volunteered at the | | | | interact with people. Research says that outgoing |
| animal shelter. He made lots of animal and people | | | | people are less lonely than others. |
| friends and soon became the director of the | | | | For example, if you go to a nearby walking track, |
| shelter. And now he has a new life which he | | | | which is frequented by lots of people in your |
| absolutely loves! | | | | community . . . instead of keeping to yourself and |
| In nearly every community there are nursing | | | | avoiding social contact, speak to other walkers |
| homes where lonely, aging and sick people reside. | | | | and enter into conversations with them. Soon |
| Open your heart to them. By helping others, you'll | | | | someone will warm up to you, and you'll have a |
| help yourself. | | | | nice, rewarding discussion. Going there several |
| I know people who take their therapy pets to | | | | times a week will allow you to keep up your new |
| nursing homes and group homes for homeless | | | | relationships with others who exercise and give |
| children, where they allow their pets to minister | | | | you the opportunity to meet new people. |
| unto the elderly and sick, to touch people's lives. I | | | | You don't have to be an extrovert to let your |
| know others who take gift baskets to nursing | | | | light shine and befriend others. In turn, they will be |
| homes. And others who play music for those who | | | | friends to you. |
| are handicapped or bedfast. | | | | 15. Find ways to make yourself more appealing. All |
| 5. Take your dog to obedience class. | | | | of us have a few flaws. Identify yours and work |
| You'll meet other dog owners and you can | | | | to change them, thus making yourself more |
| participate in fun meets and obedience trials. Note: | | | | attractive to others. |
| Avoid using your pet as a substitute for human | | | | The Power Of Good Deeds |
| companionship. But a happy, healthy dog can | | | | Good deeds always come back to us in surprising |
| introduce you to new friends! | | | | ways. They open doors for us in their own good |
| 6. Go to your house of worship and get involved. | | | | time. As you open your arms to others, you'll |
| There will be programs you can participate in and | | | | develop a kinship with many people. Soon you'll |
| people to meet, classes to join and special | | | | feel less lonely. And you'll be a part of others' lives |
| services to attend. You'll find caring people who | | | | in a most significant and important way. Go where |
| can help you to make new friends and | | | | you are needed, serve others, find creative ways |
| connections. Reach out in kindness to other lonely | | | | to give your love, help someone in need, make |
| people in the religious community. Your loneliness | | | | someone's day, and make something good |
| will subside! | | | | happen . . . you won't be so lonely! |
| 7. Find someone in your life to help in some way. | | | | Sometimes the hardest part about being lonely is |
| Sometimes just being a good listener will make | | | | feeling so down in the dumps you just can't |
| lots of new friends for you. Find someone who | | | | imagine a possible solution. |
| lives on your street or in your apartment house | | | | What do do? |
| who might welcome your friendship and strike up | | | | First, don't give into negative thoughts or |
| a conversation. | | | | expectations. Instead, think positively. |
| Offer your assistance. Give of your time. You'll | | | | And second, do something! Act! Don't allow |
| get closer to those you are helping and, chances | | | | yourself to sit around and complain. Get up and |
| are, you'll meet others in the process. And you | | | | make something happen. Just do it! Go and do a |
| won't feel lonely while you are with others. | | | | good dead. Initiate a conversation. Do something |
| 8. Visit your local coffee shop and join in the | | | | worthwhile. |
| conversations, when the opportunity presents | | | | If you follow this plan, remember to forget about |
| itself. | | | | being lonely and stop focusing your energy on |
| Get to know the employees and customers, and | | | | lonely thoughts and feelings, you'll soon find that |
| let them get to know you. Stop in on a regular | | | | your loneliness will disappear. |
| basis, and soon you'll have a home away from | | | | |